Adam Eyves
2 min readSep 29, 2021


Carol, you are a psychotherapist. Respectfully, you know what shame and manipulation are, and so do I, as someone formerly married to a BPD for 25 years.

I reread your article, and to me, it sounds like you miss your friend and are hurt. Fair enough. I’ve lost friends too. But you didn’t respect her boundaries, and she has her reasons. IMO, it’s immaterial who is right if you care about each other. Real love doesn’t divide. So I will assume there is more nuance to the story that didn’t make the final draft.

Much progress has been made regarding COVID so far. Everyone is learning right now, scientists included. We need to stay open-minded and adjust covid and vaccine expectations when necessary. No one has all the answers yet.

And to be clear, I didn’t say vaccines are “mandated.” I am saying that booster shots will be necessary to maintain real-world “effectiveness” against the mutating nature of the virus. I also have friends who have had their butts kicked by Covid. BTW, I am not anti-vax.

I’m certainly not trying to win a popularity contest by saying vaccine-hesitant people deserve respect for their decisions. That said, we should respect each other’s perspectives, despite our differing views, and work towards the best solution. Let’s be adults. There are more gray areas surrounding covid than black and white at this point.

I am shocked at the abuse I get by saying vaccine-hesitant people deserve respect for their decisions, even in your comment section. People make the wildest assumptions about what I believe. The funny thing is I agree with most of what they are saying.

To be clear to all readers, I’m not saying Carol’s feelings expressed in her article are wrong. All I’m asking anyone to do is back up their claims with accurate statistics before commenting, then we all learn something. It makes an article more credible and causes less division. If we want to know the truth, it’s necessary; otherwise, we are just expressing our emotions, and emotions lie like the devil.

You are a great writer, and this is your sandbox. From me, much respect for you and your craft.

Best wishes,




Adam Eyves

Writer, editor, storyteller, sailor, and coffee drinker. I think, I question, I imagine. I am a philosopher at heart, and a connoisseur of all good things.